Faloomp! Like wow.

Loyal Cleveland Frowns reader John F. passed on this Plain Dealer piece on this morning's street collapse at Public Square, which, thankfully, resulted in no injuries to persons. I agree with John F. that the use of quotes in the piece makes for some hard hitting reporting. I've pasted the whole thing below so that you can see for yourself.

Key intersection at Public Square caves in
Posted by Brian Albrecht & Donna J. Miller March 06, 2008 08:44AM
Categories: Breaking News

"A water line break downtown caused the intersection of Ontario and Superior avenues to collapse about 7:45 this morning.

Jackie Johnson, 57, was watching water crews try to locate a shut-off valve when the pavement went "faloomp," she said. "Like wow."

Police have closed much of Public Square. Ontario is closed between Euclid and St. Clair avenues. The crater could have swallowed up to a dozen cars, an observer said.

Linda Hayes stepped out of an RTA bus near the Justice Center and shook her head at the hole. "Girl, I saw a movie like this. It's amazing. Unbelievable." Businesses on the square still have water service.

Tri-C Metro students were sent home and the campus closed at 10 a.m. because of the water main break.

The campus lacks running water, and once service is restored, the lines will have to be flushed of contaminants, a spokeswoman said."

Hard hitting indeed, but things really get good in the comments.

Wait for it...

Wait for it...

Wait for it...

"This is what happens when George Bush gives tax breaks to the rich. They move their businesses overseas then our water lines break and our streets collapse.
I think this is a huge conspiracy. All that construction that was happening at Public Square the past year was just a front to place an explosive device to go off so the water lines would burst and the streets would collapse. Then all the businesses would move out of the buildings on Public Square so they can move to China so they can get the tax breaks George Bush gives them." --Posted by thekrenz09 on 03/06/08 at 9:51AM

YES! You can't accuse us Clevelanders of not paying attention to the political process. thekrenz09 has lifted a page right out of the Obama/Hillary Economics playbook. Well done, Sir! To be fair, this guy might well have been kidding. And he takes a beating from the rest of the commenters, one of whom has a good idea:

"I think it's kinda scenic. Maybe we can build a barrier around it and use it as the new fountain on public square. Then, we can flood and freeze the area where the old fountain is and use it for ice skating, just like Rockefeller Center in NYC..." Posted by UDFlyer on 03/06/08 at 11:23AM

westparkdude blames the Clemens investigation:

"This is a perfect example of why we need to invest more of our hard earned tax dollars on infrastructure and not steroid investigations. Be glad it wasn't the innerbelt bridge." Posted by westparkdude on 03/06/08 at 10:11AM

Moonshady mounts a vigorous defense, and ends with a bang:

". . . I guess it's our fault for establishing such a great city a long time ago and we are old now, shame on us." Posted by Moonshady on 03/06/08 at 10:30AM

bbk11 disagrees:

"This city is a joke. The only thing it has going for it is our sports teams. What else is there to do around here(?)" Posted by bbk11 on 03/06/08 at 9:58AM

The blogs, bbk! You're forgetting about the blogs!