On a profoundly depressing four-game stretch for the Tribe

by Cleveland Frowns on August 23, 2011

You can’t not feel better about it when you look at this.*

Especially with respect to the weekend sweep by the Tigers. “Profoundly depressing” is all relative, and being sad about $105,700,231 worth of world class baseball players dominating $49,190,566 worth of the same is a lot like being sad that two gallons of whiskey fills up more of your bathtub than one gallon does. Choosing to root for the $49M team over the $100M teams and the $200M teams is a lot like paying the same entry fee to play in a poker tournament against folks who will start with up to four times as many chips as you. You’ve got to be at least a little sick to do that.

None of which is to say that the whole state of affairs isn’t profoundly depressing in and of itself, but this is a state of affairs that we’ve long processed.

Nobody doesn’t know that MLB teams make most of their money from TV and radio contracts. And that teams from differently-sized media markets have differently-sized TV and radio contracts in proportion to market size. And that pretty much every owner spends pretty much the same percentage of revenue on payroll. So of course, in the nineteen baseball seasons since the Reds’ 1990 title, only one team that plays in a media market smaller than Cleveland has won the World Series, the 2006 St. Louis Cardinals — a team with such a large out-of-town fanbase that the exception proves the rule.

As easy as it is to forget all this once you catch the Tribe Fever, and as nice as it is to have a front office that has managed to figure out how to contend against all odds at semi-regular intervals, there’s also something nice about knowing there’s a limit to how much any reasonable person could possibly care about his $50,000,000 baseball team getting dominated by somebody else’s $100,000,000 team when it comes to the way the actual games playing out.** Compared to the incredible soul-dissipating mindfuck that’s the last decade-plus of our football team in a league that gives small-markets and losers every advantage, it’s actually a nice respite.

And again, yes, it all sucks, and actually it’s hard to comprehend the level of sociopathy of those in power who countenance this state of affairs, but it’s nothing we haven’t known about for awhile, and it’s not like we had much reason to think it would be any different this year going in.

Also there’s still 38 games left so who knows a loss in the ninth inning of game seven of the World Series could still be ours Tribe Tribe Tribe MLB Tribe.

—————

*It’s understood that the numbers today might be different than those reflected in this chart due to mid-season additions, but not enough to make a significant difference here.

**It’s hard to do better by way of proof of this than by looking at the kind of sociopath who does care and more about his $200,000,000 baseball team beating up on the rest.

—————

Back tomorrow to talk about the Browns.

  • Anonymous

    *38 games left..

    • Anonymous

      *thanks, bruh.

      • Anonymous

        just call me ABT – Always Be Trollin!  

        • Anonymous

          Nobody doesn’t call you that, but it’s not trolling when you do useful things.

  • CJMinCLE

    “a loss in the 9th inning of game seven of the World Series could still be ours.”  Indeed, much like a loss in the seventh inning of the Lawyers league softball playoffs…

    • Anonymous

      Don’t think I’ve let myself get sober so as to allow myself to feel that pain or that I plan to anytime soon. #whiskey #bathtubs #gallons #counting

      • Anonymous

        Frownie,  I do not get it….   One silly loss and you end up with a transvestite in your bathtub.    It is only a game Frownie.

    • Anonymous

      Also, “bottom of the seventh.” #mistakesofhistoricproportions #whiskey #bathtubs #gallons

  • Jim

    The loss last night may have been even worse than the sweep. You have to beat a team like Seattle. Instead, the Tribe bats continue their regression and the closer/classic example as to why saves are an overrated statistic, comes in and quickly craps himself and the Tribe finds themselves closer to third than first place.

    Now the Indians are apparently tweaking Jimenez’s pitching motion. Whether you liked the trade or not, that is a troubling development, especially this late in the season and especially for a pitcher who has been in the majors for the better part of four seasons with the same motion. 

    • http://twitter.com/cpmack Chris M

      Not so much of a regression as much as it is that they are getting slaughtered by injuries.

      Give Belcher some time with Jimenez. Look at what he did for Masterson.

  • George

    Pete, the terrible thing about the payroll is realizing that approximately 27 million of that number is tied up in Hafner, Sizemore, and Carmona. 

    • Anonymous

      half of which is hafner’s..  ugh..  carmona’s isn’t the worst, he’s our highest paid pitcher, but 60th highest paid pitcher in the leauge..  

    • Anonymous

      Every team has bad contracts. Some teams are freer to sign new ones to cover up for the mistakes than others are.

  • Anonymous

    Anybody else feel that earthquake?  At first we thought it was the filming down the street, but my blinds were shaking. 

    • http://twitter.com/cpmack Chris M

      yeah that was fun. I had a couple thousand pounds of ductwork swaying back and forth directly over my head.

    • Anonymous

      Hate to break it to you guys but the only people who felt the earthquake are the ones who are going to get sucked down to the underworld when the negative rapture happens. Time for some serious soul-searching, ppl.

      • Anonymous

         Whoohooo!!! Didn’t feel it!! Of course, I suppose you could say I’ve already been sucked to the underworld, both since my office is under ground level and, well, the obvious reason.

        • Anonymous

          I’m glad for you and you know I’m not the judgmental type but fwiw that might come off as unseemly gloating to someone in different shoes.

      • Anonymous

        Party pooper

  • Anonymous

    Yeah, of course from the payroll numbers we should have absolutely sucked this year and it was a great, happy surprise that all that speculative pitching came through. The truly horrifying thing to me is that there is really exactly 1 way to compete year to year as a small market team**, and while the Tribe was adhering to the script with really incredible succes, if Ubaldo doesn’t shape up, it looks like they could be a victim of that success. Even if he does, we’ve defined our window to the next two years so they’ve got to spend on some bats in the offseason or really it goes for jack anyway. So are they willing to spend it, and is it there to be acquired? Time will tell but the clock will be ticking.

    **I’m excepting the “new ballpark/taxpayer cash infusion” model that each team in our division has taken turns with for a couple years apiece.

    • Anonymous

      Agreed 100% esp that it’s time to spend some cash and that the new ballpark infusion doesn’t count.

      • http://twitter.com/cpmack Chris M

        For what it’s worth, the Indians are (not counting today) about 85k fans short of their attendance for the entire season last year. they have (I believe) 22 more games to play at home.

        • Anonymous

          All the more reason to spend some CA$H$H$H$H$H$HHHHH$$$$$$$$$$$$$

        • Anonymous

          Youch. Super Closer Chris Perez just torched us again. You have to keep saying “it’s baseball, it’s baseball…” but this sure feels like the end of the season today. Last ups…

          Yeah…it’s baseball. Choo choo’s us off and suddenly the tribe is SURGING!!!!

          • http://twitter.com/cpmack Chris M

            Nice way to walk into the 2nd game of a doubleheader. I’m sure League is hoping his day is done right now

        • Anonymous

          we’re still 6th worst in the league.. slowly movin up from having the worst average last year..  we’d have to average 32,500 the rest of the season to bring our average up to 25K per game..  which would still be 10th worst..  at least you’re out there today!  

  • Jaceczko

    There are Joe Thomases in the world and then there are… other types. 

    The Joe Thomases commit to a place and serve it and make it better.

    The…other types…use a place to make themselves better. And if it doesn’t make them better, they quit on it and try to reap their unearned prosperity in one that does.

  • Anonymous

    Ball Don’t Lie has the Cavs retiring Z’s number.  Please don’t turn it into a LeBron post.  You can write 3 Mangini posts in a row, without complaint from me if you do.

  • http://twitter.com/SeanPullins SeanPullins

    Baseball? Cleveland has a Baseball team? Who knew.  Do they have uniforms and everything?

    • Jaceczko

      Catch the fever, Sean. You too can feel what we feel, what the Frowner describes, in all its glory. :)

      • http://twitter.com/SeanInColumbus Sean Pullins

        WHAT IF? What if I did catch this fever you speak of? WHAT IF?

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  • Anonymous

    FrOrange,  sociopaths do well in life.  You make more money when you undervalue people.  Get With It.  (Where is O’Henry when we need him?)

    By the way…depression over the Indians is intrinsic….not relative.  Get With It.

    And, I thought this was a family site. We’re not allowed to say “fuck” with our mouths full.

    Buck up, Bunkie.

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