Seventh Annual Cleveland Frowns NFL Draft Party: Thursday, April 27 at Map Room

by Cleveland Frowns on April 14, 2017

This year’s draft party planning has been somewhat complicated by the fact that my wife is pregnant with our son, who’s technically due to arrive on April 28. But at this point my wife is confident that he’ll be here at least a week earlier than that, and regardless, our family prefers to abide by the wise words of Jim Brown, as borrowed from and returned to Mike Holmgren in 2010: “One monkey don’t stop the show.”

Screen Shot 2017-04-14 at 9.16.30 AM

Also, in case this kid defies predictions and arrives on or about the 27th, a committee of perennial draft-party attendees has promised to handle hosting duties in my absence. Anyway, my wife says it won’t be an issue and she’s never wrong, but even if she turns out to be in this case (I’ll keep you posted in the comments here), it will be seven years and counting that the Map Room basement won’t be empty on draft night.

(UPDATE: My wife’s streak of never having been wrong continues: Gregory McQuown Pattakos was born on April 18 at 1:06 PM. He and Mom are doing great.)

You can review details at last year’s draft party post here, or just show up at the Map Room basement (1281 West 9th St., just north of Saint Clair in the Warehouse District) anytime between 6PM and the end of the first round to enjoy—along with offerings from Map Room’s bar and kitchen—conversation about Cleveland, Browns, and things with some of your hardiest and most understanding friends.

Hope to see you there.

  • actovegin1armstrong

    Woo Hoo another SUPERBOWL (for the Browns), party! If anyone says the word Trubisky it shall be followed with a group “gesundheit”.

    • Cleveland Frowns

      I assume your vote is for Garrett with 1? Who with 12?

      • actovegin1armstrong

        I posted this on 603brown about a month ago:
        Miles Garrett
        Malik Hooker (The Browns once traded a Fair Hooker for a Jubilee Dunbar)
        Anthony Walker somewhere
        Jerome Lane
        Tyler Orlosky
        Ramcyzk, or my guy Davenport (“my guy” may not be a good thing, I thought My guy T Y Hilton was going to win the Heisman as a sophomore)
        Pipkin, Peterman, or Torgersen, I like all three, and as I may have once briefly alluded, I do not like quarterbacks. Keil is out there too.
        Tre’Davious White
        Sojourn Shelton
        Jalen Myrick

        • actovegin1armstrong

          I had an early qb ranking on 603 about 3 months ago:
          In a typical draft class of hit or miss quarterback picks here is the appropriate ranking:
          1) Mahomes
          2.) Kizer
          3.) Watson
          4.) Evans
          5.) Trubisky (He may be better, but I did not see it. He does love the Browns, so one must question his intelligence.)
          6.) Peterman (He will shine if he is given a fair shake.

        • Cleveland Frowns

          This all sounds fine to me but I wouldn’t mind getting one of the good tight ends at 12, O.J. Howard (the return of the Wizard?) or Njoku from Miami.

          • Petefranklin

            You got your TE. I would have preferred Hooker over Peppers though.

  • Mike B.

    so i’m fine with garrett at 1; seems a little hyped, but the fact of his bypassing being at the draft is a good sign. give garrett-shelton-ogbah a year together, pick up a first round ILB next year and in 2018 the browns’ front 3 might finally pose problems for other teams.

    taking the best wiscy o-lineman is rarely (never?) a bad move; gimme ramczyk at 12. three badgers on the o-line? rufkm? no brainer. (love the zeitler signing.)

    then if we can finagle back into the first round to get corey davis… well then it won’t matter if it’s kessler or osweiler at qb since we’ll have the o-line in place for a decent run game and good sized possession WR. failing that, i go for the wku o-lineman both because i never want to see cam erving again and to see tony grossi’s head pop off of his shoulders.

    those jones-ing for a savior qb will find him late with chad kelly; perfect red-shirt season for any qb we draft anyway.

    and speaking of ole miss, i’ll overdraft stringfellow please. top of the third will do.

    browns pull this draft off as shown above and scrap the uniforms, 2018 could be fun.

    • Cleveland Frowns

      You’re nothing if not consistent with your OL prescriptions. And I do like that Garrett won’t show up to the draft (didn’t know that). As noted above, I wouldn’t mind getting Howard or Njoku at 12. Seems that guys like this are hard to find and the teams that have them can create big advantages.

  • Cleveland Frowns

    I’m glad to report that my wife was right as always. Baby Greg arrived yesterday and he and mom are doing great, which means that I’ll make it to Map Room next Thursday for the festivities (unless something crazy happens). Also, I’m counting on one of you to report to Child Protective Services if any photos surface of this kid wearing Browns gear.

  • Cleveland Frowns

    Cleveland mayoral candidate Brandon Chrostowski will be stopping by the draft party to meet folks and answer questions about his campaign. See here for more details:

  • actovegin1armstrong

    Browns draft:
    1. Garrett Love this pick! Not Jadeveon (One Great Play) Clown 2.0
    1b. Peppers Love this pick too! “Oh no….he can play 6 different positions on defense, dominate Special Teams, and could be a weapon on offense as a Wildcat QB. This is horrible.” This guy slide down the draft board because he has too much talent.
    We have a lot of scouts and GM’s who are unclear of the concept of drafting players.
    1c Njoku Frownie called this one and he likes this guy, so I shall defer to Frownie’s superior knowledge. However, to me he threw “Lookout Blocks” all too often and I did not like the trade-up in a TE rich draft.
    2. Kizer Great pick if he can be coached up, otherwise I may get to reuse one of my favorite heckling moments during an interview on WEWS, “Hang the Kaiser!” Love his arm and accuracy on passing downfield, but he certainly had some Steve Sax throws too.
    3. Ogunjobi Great talent and he does not know that Cincinnati exists. I love him already.
    4. Wilson Great pick too! “Substandard measurables, his arms are 5/8″ too short to play in the NFL.” Who cares? He is a corner who can cover and he loves to hit and tackle. Big plus for his desire to hit.
    5. Johnson I watched him and he looks terrific to me, but I know as much about pass blocking as I know about quarterbacks. I read that he fell to the 5th round because he bends at the L5 vertebrae too often when facing a “swim move”. I shall defer to JK/MB our resident O-line expert to vote for this pick.
    6. Brantley He looks very talented. The Browns screwed up this one, not in drafting him, but in drafting him then promising to drop him at the first hint that he may be guilty. They should remain quite, we have a judicial system in this country let them do their job. He is innocent until proven guilty on TMZ.
    7. Gonzales Gonzales is a very common name so I have been unable to find anything at all on this guy. The magical interweb says he is a K, or perhaps a PK. There are no football positions named K, or PK, so this one may be a completely wasted vote.
    7. Dayes I love this pick! Mr almost irrelevant! This is where one should pick a running back. Dayes is small, strong and he has hands like an oversized coatimundi. If he does not fumble very much, he slows down blitzers a bit and gives the Browns an excuse to cut Crowell the buffoon I shall love this pick even more.
    What say you? Frownie, jk/mb, P4, Quailshorts, et al?

    • Hopwin

      You seem to literally love everything about every single pick we made. Excellent, see you at the Superbowl parade 🙂

      • actovegin1armstrong

        I did not like the trade up for a tight end who cannot block. I may have mentioned that and I did not make a single one of these picks. So, what is this “we” stuff?

      • actovegin1armstrong

        How do you feel about them? Love the image, Kool-aid has been my nickname since 1994. I really would like to read your evaluation and see you at the Stupor-bowl parade.

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