Cleveland Frowns 2008 Person of the Year Nominee: Lyndon Antcliff

On the night of the day that we nominated Ralph Hardy for our 2008 Person of the Year award, we had beers with our good friend DF who said that while the story of Ralph Hardy was probably too good to be true, he was glad that it was written in the first place. So are we, which is why we're nominating online marketer Lyndon Antcliff for our 2008 Person of the Year award because it turns out that he completely fabricated the Hardy story to help his client, Money.co.uk, direct more traffic to its website. According to Antcliff himself (look in the comments for commenter "Lyndon"), "the story is [a]bsolutely-completely-utterly a fabrication, a tissue of lies weaved in a fog of deceit. Or what most people would call satire. Nowhere do I see the author claiming this is true or that it is attributed to a news report."

When taken to task by fellow internet marketers, Antcliff was unapologetic: "[A]s I am not a journalist and as I did not claim it to be true I don't feel bad at all. I let people decide for themselves wether it is true. News organisations contstantly publish untruths dressed up and news and people don't seem to mind all that much. So when Fox news picks up a story with no corraboration or even an author and then dresses it up as true, that is where your ire should be pointed at. . . . My background is as a fiction writer, stories are written as if they actually happen, it's what Shakespeare did, it's what Hemingway did. I wrote in the style of a news report but it was fiction, just like the Daily News makes a program in the style of a news show. . . . I didn't dupe the media, the idiots duped themselves, they are responsible for what they print not me. If they are stupid enough to print a story that has no basis in fact and does not even have a writer listed then tough! I don't give a toss what they think, if they want to play fast and loose with their website it's their problem. It's a pretty stupid thing to say I am responsible for what someone else puts on their website. If you are going to print a story, get it verified. I know that and I am not even a journalist, lol."

Lol indeed. Except that we're not sure that Money.co.uk doesn't have a fraud claim against Antcliff. Philipp Lenssen points out at Google Blogoscope that Antcliff "managed to lower the image of his apparent client, Money.co.uk, who got themselves involved in a very shady marketing technique," and "Jonathan Crossfield writes [at his blog], 'if this article is incorrect, how can a reader trust any of the financial advice contained on the site?'"

Cleveland Frowns hopes that this nomination (and perhaps the big prize) will take the sting out of any judgment that Antcliff might be forced to pay. We also think that Antcliff should go back to fiction writing. The Ralph Hardy Chronicles anyone?

There's a smarmy piece on this over at Gawker as well which is worthwhile mainly for a link to this story about Jenkem. Leroy Jenkems! And pardon us for being optimists, Pareene. We think that the occasional internet hoax is a small price to pay.

Cavs vs. Celtics Game 6 Preview, and A Major Award

We wrote before Game 5 on Wednesday that while folks expected the Game 5 LeBron magic that we've grown accustomed to, LeBron did not have it in him, physically, to get it done. We were right. LeBron busted out of the gates with 23 first half points, but was ineffective in the second half. Folks who want to credit the Celtics defense for this are giving the Celtics defense too much credit. LeBron is hurt. And his hurt back is even going to his head. He's forgetting to tip waiters at his favorite restaurants, which embarrasses all of us Clevelanders. The boy needs rest.

So now David Stern turns his attention to the next round, where his Celtics must get over the Detroit Pistons in the next round to arrive at Stern's wet-dream Lakers/Celtics media schlob-fest. Stern knows it will be no easy task for the Boston to get over the Stones, and we don't expect he's taking any chances with this one. To get the Celtics some extra rest, he'll call in the zebras tonight in Cleveland. We're picking another Celtics victory tonight. We're not even sad about it. The state of LeBron's health right now is such that a Cavs victory would be phyrric. We'll be launching our "he better not play in the Olympics" campaign next week. The Pick: Celtics +2.5 over Our Broken Cavs.

Finally -- if anyone doubts just how powerful the forces are that are behind the impending Stern wet-dream Lakers/Celtics media schlob-fest, consider again the free pass that Kevin Garnett has received for pounding his chest and screaming "f*cking f*ggots" to the Cleveland crowd, all captured in slow motion on TNT. Compare this to the treatment that our own Brady Quinn received from major media outlets when he was alleged to use an anti-gay slur in a fight outside of a bar in Columbus this winter. This wasn't even captured on camera, let alone broadcast in slow-motion to millions. Try this google search, "Kevin Garnett anti-gay slur." Our Wednesday post about this issue is the number one result, with no other major media coverage of this story anywhere in sight. Try "Kevin Garnett gay slur" The results are even more remarkable. Cleveland Frowns is the third result, and the first two are stories about the ALLEGED Brady Quinn incident. We will write more about the disparate treatment these two incidents have received in the media in a later post, but for now, we wonder: are we missing something? To find out, we'll send a Major Award, aka a $50 money order, to the first Cleveland Frowns reader who can direct our attention to coverage of this issue in a major American publication this week. We'll define major loosely, as a publication that appears to be more "major" than the site of our friends at Waiting for Next Year. Email us at clevelandfrowns@gmail.com with your results. Happy hunting!

Cavs vs. Celtics: Game 5 Preview

Before we get to talking about tonight's game, we want to express our shock at the lack of reporting/public outcry about the fact that media darling Kevin Garnett shouted an anti-gay slur (f*cking f*gg*ts) at the Cleveland crowd during game four. This was picked up by and broadcast in slo-mo by the TNT crew, as you can see in the above video. While this has been discussed on some local blogs, there has been nothing on ESPN about Garnett's hateful use of the word, and a Google searches using terms like "Kevin Garnett" "slur" "gay" "anti-gay" and "f-ggot" turn up no major media stories about this incident. We're awfully curious as to why this is the case, but it is consistent with the general media fawning over Garnett and this Celtics team, and only reinforces our conspiracy theories about David Stern and his plans for an untainted Lakers/Celtics NBA Finals.

As for tonight's game: The last two games have shown that the Celtics have bigger problems than most people anticipated (excellent piece by Bill Simmons today about that), and that LeBron's supporting cast is better than they've been given credit for. The big trade for Ben Wallace, Wally Sczerbiak, Joe Smith, and Delonte West is paying big dividends, with all four players making tremendous contributions in Game 3 and 4. Now the Cavs have the momentum going into game five in Boston tonight, in a round 2 where road teams are 1-17. Cavs expert Brian Windhorst reminds us that the Cavs have been here before, and this is where LeBron has been at his best, having led the team to victory in Detroit in the exact same situation in each of the last two years.

But in both of these games, LeBron has, quite literally, carried the team on his back. As Cleveland Frowns readers well know, we don't think he has it in him, physically, to do that tonight. Despite his well-rounded performance, and his jaw dropping dunk on Monday night, LeBron's scoring output is significantly down, he's still shooting well below 30% for the series, and, with rare exceptions, is not moving with the same force and speed that we're accustomed to seeing. We're going to keep hedging, and stick with the Celtics, and will of course be pleasantly surprised if our pick is wrong. The Pick: Celtics -9 over Our Cavs.

Why Even Have a Bullpen?

Of course, it gets worse before it gets better. The Tribe lost 2-1 in the 10th inning yesterday in Minnesota after Rafael Perez gave up consecutive singles (all shots) to the 9th, 10th, and 11th batters that he faced. One might ask, why leave Perez in to face that 11th batter? Your guess is as good as ours, which is that Eric Wedge is retarded. Perez, a set-up man, usually pitches one, no more than two, innings. When Brendan Harris, then Jason Kubel, hit hard singles off of him to put runners at first and second, he had faced 10 batters, having retired six of them. Seemed like an honest days work for old Raffy at that point. It sure looked like time to bring in Jensen Lewis who’d been warming up in the bullpen. In fact, the entire bullpen should have been available with Cliff Lee, Jake Westbrook, and Paul Byrd all turning in solid (7+ inning) starts for the series. With the day off today, there was even less of a need to preserve arms. Justin Morneau, the Twins best hitter, 2006 AL MVP, and one of the best hitters in baseball was up next. It might be that Morneau was 0 for his career against Perez, who, in fairness to Wedge, had struck Morneau out in the eighth inning. Even so, Perez had already pitched beyond his normal game day workload and had been hit hard by both of the previous two batters. Plus Morneau had already seen Perez once that afternoon. Yet Wedge decided to let Perez face him again, giving Morneau a chance at redemption. The Twins were the home team. The pressure was all on Perez. We saw it coming from a mile away. Thwack! Game winning single to right field.

If you don’t use your bullpen in a situation like that, when do you use it? These relief pitchers aren’t starters for a reason. Isn’t the whole point of a bullpen to bring fresh new pitchers in out of it to keep batters off balance at the end of a game? Neither the Plain Dealer nor Beacon Journal reporters who filed stories about this game cared to raise this question, both choosing to focus on the Tribe’s weak offense. Why these reporters didn’t raise this issue, which was directly and chiefly relevant to the outcome of the ballgame, is anyone’s guess. Until we get any information to the contrary, we will assume it is because they are either too entrenched to want to ask the tough questions, or are retarded themselves. Probably both. Either way, we're watching you Wedgie. And we did not like what we saw yesterday. At least today’s off day (and this bit of good local news) gives us a chance to rest our frowning muscles. . . unless LeBron breaks his back tonight.